Ahhhh....relief at last!

Yippeee! It's the evening of the 31st, and our deadline is over. We completed all the reports that we needed to before the contract went poof with the end of the fiscal year. Surprisingly, the client already issued us a new contract to continue the audits for the new fiscal year, and so we'll be able to continue our environmental auditing at a more reasonable pace....at say 3 or 4 audits a month and not 20 like Sarah and I did for the month of August.


Now that our schedule will go back to normal, tomorrow will seem like an easy, breezy day. I've already begun working on an investigation/assessment report and feel almost giddy because it's such a change of pace from those boring audits.

Every night for this past week I've had to go to mom's to feed the cat, play with the cat, water the plants, scoop the poops, water the grass, and check the mail. The first couple of days, Bogey could hardly be bothered with my presence and he was none too impressed with the canned food. By the third day, he was practically attacking me when I opened the door. I opened the back door for him to go out back for a bit of fresh air...and naturally he went to the extremely shady side of the house with no grass...and rolled in the dirt for several minutes while I watered mom's plants. While I was scooping his poops from the litter the other day he was meowing for me to let him into the garage so that he could roll around and bake himself in the heat. I kept telling him no...and that it was too hot...and yes I'm one of those people that actually talks to animals and pets. Well apparently Bogey did not like me telling him no that he couldn't go into the garage so as I walked out of the utility room toward the living room he lunged at my feet and gave me a good swat! Stinker! The next afternoon I decided to let him out in the garage to bask in the heat since he wanted to so badly. And yesterday evening while the sprinkler was going, I lay on mom's couch dozing and petting Bogey. Actually I just held my hand out over the side of the couch and he kinda petted himself!

My sister's been taking care of Bogey's dog brother, Dill. Dill is a little fox terrier that my sister rescued and gave to our parents two years ago. I offered to keep Dill here at animal central while mom and dad were in Europe, but I think that they were afraid that Dill would be overrun by my three bigger dogs. But Bogey will be reunited with Dill this weekend when my sister comes up to stay at the folk's house. I imagine that Bogey will drive my sister crazy the first day over there too. And I get a break from my chores at their house!

I'm looking forward to a more normal work routine for awhile. And I'm looking forward to seeing the checks for this just completed work come in the mail in the next 40 days. Ahhh...now that will be nice!

Is it August 31st yet?!

I don't usually wish time to move more quickly, but in this case with the report marathon I'm making an exception. Oy vey, I'm tired! I feel like the guy from the old Dunkin' Donuts commercials that appeared in each commercial in a zombie like state uttering his mantra....Time to make the donuts....time to make the donuts....time to make the....only for me it's...time to write the reports!

While in the middle of writing an environmental audit report today, I had a small wave of panic wash over me. As I was writing, I began to think that what I was writing was incorrect and it should actually be something else....and so as my mind raced thinking about this information I realized that I was actually thinking of the information for one of the other facilities. Doh! They're all running together into one big audit mess in my brain.

I see the light at the end of the tunnel though. I'll have three reports for Sarah to review tomorrow and hopefully she'll catch any instances of me mixing and/or crossing facility information.

My report writing reprieve will be shortlived though. Brad will be back with his field notes for a Site Assessment Report that I'll have to write for the client...and chop-chop. At least these types of reports are much more interesting to write. I actually have to think on this type of report and make conclusions based on data and such.

I baked some blueberry muffins for Sarah and me for tommorrow morning. I figure the sugar boost will help me at least get through yet another day of the report grind.

Time now for relaxing only...and hoping for pleasant dreams later...and hopefully none of those dreams will be invaded by my version of the donut guy!

The not as planned Wednesday...

This morning was the morning to drive the parental units to the airport for their trip to Europe. I figured my mom was gonna be a bit nervous about her schedule so I headed out a few minutes early. Well that was the plan anyway! I started to back my car out of the garage and immediately felt that something wasn't right. I hopped out to take a look and yep...sure enough just as I feared...a flat tire. And I mean flat...flat as a pancake flat. So I called mom right away, told her about the flat, and told her to bring their car over to pick me up so that I could take them to the airport. I was afraid that this would have set mom's nerves on edge since it was an unscheduled change, and personal experience with General Mom indicates that unscheduled changes make her edgy to put it politely! What a pleasant surprise...they showed up a few minutes later...dad had me pop in the driver's seat and away we went! They were both cheerful and excited and they both took the little car snafu in stride. I didn't think it was a big deal from the get-go, but my past experience with the parental units has been if I don't think something is a big deal, they'll think it's the end of the world as we know it!
So we had a nice chat on the way to the airport, they both were so excited, and mom was uncharacteristically calm and unbossy. I hope that they enjoy their trip...and I think they will.

The flat tire threw off the rest of my day, but I figured what the hell. I hate getting a flat, but I would much rather have a flat in my own drive-way than on the side of the highway. So I filled the tire with air and let it sit in the garage for an hour or two to make sure that it would hold well enough to got to the tire place. Sure enough the air held...and off I went. I sat in the waiting area for about an hour...and voila tire fixed...no charge...I got that tire insurance when I bought them.

I didn't get any of the report work done that I needed to today. But oh well that's life. I know that I'll still get it done by the deadline.

The two new file cabinets came today at 5:15p, so I spent the evening reorganizing and tidying the corporate office. So the corporate office is starting to look like a real corporate office...well except for the wine rack in one corner!

So the day didn't go as I planned whatsoever, but I took it in stride and wasn't upset in the least. I figure I needed a day's reprieve from report writing anyway. Plus tomorrow is a new day...

The corporate office is looking mighty spiffy! 

Tuesday this and that...

This morning Sarah and I finalized the big honkin' audit that she was working on. That leaves us seven fairly small straightforward audits to complete by next Thursday. I think that we'll be able to do it okay and without it coming down to the 11th hour.

We had a meeting scheduled with our grocery chain client for 2pm. My house is located on the far westside of San Antonio and her office is located on the far eastside in a crappy industrial area which is where the grocery distribution center is located. And Sarah's favorite little Italian bistro Ciao Lavenderia is conveniently located in between which means just north of downtown. So guess where we had lunch? We were the only two lunatics that sat outside on the patio in the heat. It really wasn't bad outside either since we were in the shade and there was a breeze. Sarah had her favorite pannini and I had the tomato basil risotto. The food was great as usual, and it was a nice relaxing lunch. We arrived at the client's office right on time only to find out she had called in sick today. Her boss was shocked that she hadn't called to reschedule, but we figured if you're sick and let's say barfing all day the last thing on your mind is calling to reschedule a meeting. I think that her boss thought that we'd be angry or something. Come on, that's silly. Things happen. Plus what's to complain about anyway? We just won two projects and were asked to invoice the work even before beginning. Sarah and I figure it all worked out anyway. We got a break from the report grind and had a nice lunch, and we got back here early to work on a few things that we didn't think that we'd get to because of the project meeting. So the day didn't go as planned, but it turned out just fine. What more could we ask for?

I ordered the new file cabinets and they should be delivered tomorrow. I thought that they were kind of expensive for being two big pieces of sheet metal, but we need them. So oh well. So by tomorrow afternoon the corporate office should be looking a bit neater and more organized.

Brad will be in Norfolk, Virginia this weekend doing drilling fieldwork. The property owner that is possibly selling to our client doesn't want his employees to know he's selling so he would only allow the drilling on the weekend. And boy what a tough time we had finding a drilling company to work on the weekend. I can't say I blame most for not wanting to do it. Drillers work long hours in the summer and usually have more work than they can handle so there's no motivation. Of course Brad is acting like he's being a real trouper for working on the weekend...but do you think he's been over to work on any of the Sundays that Sarah and I have worked? No need to answer that question I think!

Tomorrow morning I take my parents to the airport for their two week trip to Latvia with a stop on the way back in Amsterdam. Mom emigrated from Latvia when she was 10 years old and so still has relatives in Latvia. Her cousin, Maija is a few years older in her late 60s, and her health has been a bit iffy the last few years. Last year she had knee replacement surgery, so Mom isn't sure how well she'll be getting around on foot. I think Mom's afraid that this may be one of the last times that she gets to see her. Maija's grandson, Andris, is Erik's age and they've e-mailed each other once in awhile, so it would be nice for all of us to go to Riga sometime to meet our Latvian relatives. Maija and Andris visited the folks in Florida a few years ago when they still lived there. Unfortunately we didn't get a chance to go visit them then.

Mom and Maija are the last generation of the family with a personal connection, so I'm afraid once they both pass on we'll lose touch with that part of the family. I think it's important in the next few years for my sister and I to have the opportunity to meet them so that we can stay connected as a family. Plus Andris has a 10 year visa for here, so hopefully he'll come over now and then.

As I write this, I'm surprised that my mom hasn't called to remind me to pick them up in the morning to take them to the airport!

Monday mish-mash...

The adrenaline is pumping to complete several environmental audits for one of our really good clients before the end of August. August 31st is the end of their fiscal year and so the budget for these goes bye-bye. I've been working six days a week the last few weeks, and Sarah has been coming over to work on Sundays. It looks like I'll be working every day until the 31st in order to get these reports done. Unfortunately all my brain power will be channeled to getting the reports done!

Sarah went to her doctor last week for her last check-up to see how her sock is mending (pun intended)!! Anyway, it seems the new sock is healing nicely, but Sarah did have a few more questions for her doctor now that she no longer has a uterus. Naturally Sarah wanted to know if she would have to have Pap smears any longer...and the surprising answer is yes she does....so she immediately asked the doc what exactly would be smeared since she no longer has a cervix or uterus for smearing. Apparently the doc will take a smear of her vaginal walls instead. Hmmm...interesting. What a bummer though. I think that she was hoping that along with no more period she could add no more pap smears to the list...alas no such luck.

With all this rush for the end of the fiscal year, it got me to thinking about how many people here in Texas say physical year when they mean fiscal. It always cracks me up when I hear someone say physical year and mean it. One of my other favorite malapropisms that you hear around here is medium for median. I saw a sheriff being interviewed on the local news and he was telling the reporter about a body that was discovered in the tall grass in the highway medium! Yep...I watched the late news just to make sure that I heard him correctly and he said that a body was discovered in the highway medium! I think that the tv station folks must have been giggling the whole time while putting the piece together. Also, a surprising number of people say fruitation when I hope they mean fruition. I've heard this one a lot and it makes me snicker every time!

So the end of the fiscal year gets me reminiscing about my favorite and often heard malapropisms. As I think of others througout the week, I'll be sure and share.

Right Brain...Left Brain...or No Brain!

Since I wore myself out last week being wordy, I thought a little break was in order. So I couldn't help myself with this little ditty...Enjoy!

Brain Lateralization Test Results

Right Brain (51.6%) The right hemisphere is the visual, figurative, artistic, and intuitive side of the brain. Left Brain (48.4%) The left hemisphere is the logical, articulate, assertive, and practical side of the brain

Are You Right or Left Brained?(word pair test)
personality tests by similarminds.com

Left brain dominant individuals are more orderly, literal, articulate, and to the point. They are good at understanding directions and anything that is explicit and logical. They can have trouble comprehending emotions and abstract concepts, they can feel lost when things are not clear, doubting anything that is not stated and proven.

Right brain dominant individuals are more visual and intuitive. They are better at summarizing multiple points, picking up on what's not said, visualizing things, and making things up. They can lack attention to detail, directness, organization, and the ability to explain their ideas verbally, leaving them unable to communicate effectively.

Overall you appear to have fairly Equal Hemispheres

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According to Darwinian theory, optimal evolution takes place with random variation and selective retention. The evolution savvy individual will try many different approaches when faced with a problem and select the best of those approaches. Many historical intellectuals have confessed their advantage was simply considering/exploring/trying more approaches than others. The left brain dominant type suffers from limited approaches, narrow-mindedness. The right brain dominant type suffers from too many approaches, scatterbrained. To maintain balanced hemispheres, you need to exercise both variability and selection. Just as a company will have more chance of finding a great candidate by increasing their applicant pool, an individual who considers a wider set of options is more likely to make quality decisions.

Being Gracious...

Some days, like today, I wonder if there's been an erosion of overall good manners. And judging from reading a certain Seattlite's blog post from yesterday, I think I may not be the only one. The first thing I wonder is if technology has contributed to this erosion at all.

Cell phones and the internet come to mind right away when thinking of technology. I happen to think that too many people have bad cell phone manners. I put Brad at the top of this ill mannered list. But if I started to complain about the lack of cell phone manners and internet etiquette, I could fill a whole post about Brad's behavior alone!

So I'd rather talk about the flip side to bad manners and to me the ultimate in good manners is being gracious. Most of us probably simply think of good manners as saying please and thank you and those kinds of things...and you say these things because they're expected. But being gracious is, in my view, more than acting as you should, it's a way of life. What is it to be gracious?

Well the dictionary says the following regarding the word gracious:

1. Characterized by kindness and warm courtesy.
2. Characterized by tact and propriety: responded to the insult with gracious humor.
3. Of a merciful or compassionate nature.
4. Characterized by charm or beauty; graceful.
5. Characterized by elegance and good taste: gracious living.

So gracious people naturally practice good manners because it's part of their nature. Gracious people exude a warmth and kindness that affects all their behavior including their manners. And in my own experience, you can tell the difference between the folks that are polite because they think it's expected and those that are polite because they just are. Gracious people just are. Gracious people are the sorts of people that we like to be around. Hopefully, we've all been fortunate enough to have gracious people in our lives.

I know that I'm lucky to have as many gracious friends that I do, and I include many of my internet friends in that group. My friends, Sarah and Chad, are two of the most gracious people I've ever known. Although I've yet to meet my Seattlite internet friend, I have to say she's been nothing but warm and kind to me, and therefore, gracious. And I'd like to think that my own sons are well on their way to being gracious men. They both certainly have good manners, and maturity will determine if they take the next step to graciousness.

And recently I've been fortunate to witness public graciousness in action by another internet friend. She recently had to endure, in my opinion anyway, some inappropriate public criticism which ultimately was just downright rude behavior on the part of the commenters. How did she deal with this situation? Well many people would probably think that she would have been justified in lashing back at these people. I really don't think that anyone would or could have faulted her for responding in kind, but she did something else instead. She let her gracious nature take over. And although her feelings were probably hurt to some degree, she responded graciously. She actually thanked them for their comments and responded with both tact and propriety, and even humor. So when people say that adversity builds character, I would add that adversity also reveals character. And I think that my friend's true character was revealed in how she chose to respond. She's an extremely gracious individual, and I'm glad to count her among my friends.

So upon further reflection, I think I'm wrong about technology being responsible for bad manners. I think that technology perhaps just emphasizes the bad behavior of people with shakey manners to begin with like Brad. I've seen him display good manners on numerous occasions, but I've also seen him display bad manners like rudely interrupting a conversation and meal at a restaurant to engage in a non-urgent and/or unimportant cell phone call while those at the table eat.

So it's the people not the technology. But I still stick to my belief that there's been an erosion of good behavior and manners. I don't know what the solution is though...other than parents need to do a better job. But what if the parents have bad manners? Aye, that's the rub.

I've tried my best to ensure that my own boys have naturally good manners, and I think that I have been successful judging from the compliments about their behavior that I've received over the years. So I guess to stem the tide of bad manners, we each must try to affect and infect our own corner of the universe with graciousness. And really isn't that true about most things? All we can do is try our best and hope that it spreads to others by example.

Anticipation...

When I was a kid I remember getting all excited about some of those box top offers on the back of cereal boxes. You know, the ones where if you send in the correct number of box tops plus $1.95 for shipping and handling, the cereal company will send you a special decoder ring or Spiderman watch for free. And let me tell you there was at least one decoder ring and one watch that I absolutely had to have. So I followed the cereal box instructions and sent in my request. My 10 year old brain also noted that it would take anywhere from 4 to 6 weeks to process and send my special decoder ring. That's an eternity for a 10 year old!!

I remember wondering after I mailed my request how I was ever going to survive the excitement and anticipation waiting 4 to 6 weeks for my decoder ring! At least once every day, I would excitedly think about getting that decoder ring. Once 3 weeks had elapsed, I began checking the mailbox just in case it came early. I was an optimist even then! Everyday I would wake up excited thinking that this is the day that my ring comes. My hopes would be momentarily dashed once I checked the mail and it hadn't come. It was momentary though because I knew that tomorrow meant a new possibility. Of course the decoder ring didn't arrive until a smidge past the 6 week mark like those things usually do. And to tell you the truth, today I can't really tell you anything about the decoder ring or Spiderman watch that I just had to have. But the thing that sticks with me to this day is that wonderful feeling of anticipation. The excitement and hopefulness of something coming along the horizon.

We're usually so pragmatic with our thinking and so most of us, I think, probably associate anticipation as simply a means to an end. Like a rainbow as simply a means of pointing the way to the pot of gold. So this got me to thinking. Can't that wonderful feeling of anticipation just be an end in and of itself? Isn't the rainbow wonderful on its own without the pot of gold at the end?

That decoder ring and watch wound up being nothing special, but I do remember that wonderful feeling of looking forward to something. And in retrospect, the less than stellar result didn't really ruin the feeling of anticipation in the long run. I remember the excitement of anticipation more than I remember being disappointed by the actual product. So anticipation can be good all by itself whether the result winds up being as good or not...like my decoder ring.

And quite often, anticipation adds to the thrill of a good result kinda like being excited about an upcoming trip. Half the fun is just being excited about the trip in advance. If the journey turned out to be as great as you anticipated then the anticipation added to your enjoyment and overall experience.

I also think that people that really relish taking their time opening gifts have this anticipation idea down pat. You know the folks I'm talking about, it takes them forever to open a gift because they like to look at the gift box from all angles....they like to take the time to maybe guess the contents...and most of all they like just looking at the package for a bit because they somehow recognize that before that box is opened it holds almost limitless possibilities and so they realize in those moments the maximum amount of anticipation. I think for those people the anticipation is a greater gift than the actual gift. Although they may love the gift inside, the anticipation was just as wonderful a gift for them. And even if the gift wasn't so great, they appreciate and love the gift of anticipation so much that it doesn't matter. I like this attitude.

In the past, I was always so anxious to tear into my gifts to get at the prize inside, but upon further reflection I think I may have been missing out on the wonderful nuances of anticipation. That anticipation can be a gift in and of itself much like a rainbow.

Odds and Ends...

I'm still on Consultant's Cloud Nine today. The thrill of the two new projects has yet to wear off. And in my excitement this morning over having extra money, I excitedly told Sarah that I can now order those two file cabinets that we've been needing. She just looked at me and shook her head and chuckled. Then she realized that if Brad were doing the buying, he'd want to buy some expensive piece of environmental equipment that would be nice to have but not necessary. So she quickly became a bit more enthusiastic about the file cabinets! With Brad we've found that discussing the merits and cost of a particular piece of equipment doesn't work. We stumbled on the only method of dissuasion that works with him and that is to ask him if he'd rather have the equipment or if he'd like to be paid. We've found that works very nicely indeed. Of course if we had plenty of extra money, we'd get the equipment. But if the choice is paycheck or equipment, well there's no contest. Oh the thrills and decisions for the small business owner!

Now on to the odds and ends. Yikes I had to fill up my Passat's tank today and the total was $36. That's ridiculous! Less than two years ago I could fill my tank for less than $20. I can only imagine how the SUV owners must cry at the pump. What the hell is up with petroleum prices? I personally think that the big oil companies as well as OPEC are taking advantage of the war and unrest in the Middle East to keep prices inflated. Of course the party line is much different according to the papers, but I don't believe it. Sheesh if this keeps up maybe I need to consider switching from environmental geology to petroleum geology!

Sarah recently told me how her ob-gyn explained her hysterectomy surgery which was quite humorous...if hysterectomy surgery can be funny. Anyway, her uterus was removed but her ovaries were saved, so the doc explained that once the uterus was removed that end of her vaginal canal was sewn up like the toe end of a sock. And in essence without her uterus and the sewn end it's like her vagina is now a sock. Hmmm. So as she has been recovering over these last several weeks, I ask her how her sock is doing! Chad wanted Sarah to ask her doc exactly what kind of sock is it? An ankle sock or crew sock or tube sock. He was very interested in getting more details on this sock thing and naturally his most important question was how soon the sock could be used!

Lastly, I really don't mind the heat at all. But I really am a big baby when it comes to humidity. I really don't mind 90 or 100 degree weather if the humidity is below 50%, but lately the temps have been in the high 90s with humidity over 60%. So my hikes have been quite the steambaths. Today as I was cooling off next to my car in the shade (ha, that's a joke) I noticed Washington State plates on the car across from mine. Two thoughts imediately popped into my head. First, all I could imagine was those Washington hikers melting and suffering around the trails. I'm used to the heat and I thought it was quite hot today, so I can only imagine that they were in agony. Secondly, good grief that must have been some long drive all the way from the Pacific Northwest to South Texas. Yikes. If they're here on vacation, I hope that they like hot weather. And if they just moved here, I hope that they like hot weather!

What a great Monday!

I usually don't say that...what a great Monday! But I am today. I submitted a bid to our grocery chain client a few weeks ago, and last week she called and asked me to meet with her about another project. She's the type of client that we'd like to do more work for. Not so much because of her company although that is an important factor, but really more because she's straightforward, easy-going, honest, and just overall someone that's a pleasure to work with. On Friday I met with her to discuss the new project, and I took her to lunch.

So I was very excited to learn today that she awarded us both projects! I really didn't expect that we'd get both projects to be perfectly honest. And it's not because I think that she may think that we couldn't handle both, but many clients try to spread their work around to a few consultants to try to give everyone a little something. So that makes this award a real coup for us.

When I exclaimed to Sarah that I couldn't believe that we got both projects....she couldn't help but tweak me a little and say that it must have been my charisma that got us both projects!! That just made me laugh even more.

It's a banner day for our environmental consulting company. And what makes it even better is that our client needs us to invoice for the projects for the full amount even before we do them. Yee-ha! What a day!

On a completely unrelated note, I think I am really beginning to understand the powers that be that say that writing humor is difficult. Apparently, when I think I'm writing something with humor, I'm not. I imagine that subtle and dry humor are the most difficult to convey with the written word. So a double hats off to you Cousin for having the talent to write humor so well...me thinks I need some pointers!

The funny thing about routine...

If I'm at home, I have a pretty standard routine that I follow every Sunday morning without fail. I sleep in a little later, and upon awakening I head downstairs to make coffee. By the time I get downstairs, the dogs are clamoring around me hoping that the Biscuit Lady will get them their expected morning biscuit treat. So while the coffee brews, I get the dogs their treats and I refill the cat bowl with food. While I'm waiting for the coffee to brew, I turn on the tv to HGTV to have on in the background. I fix myself a cup of coffee and I sit down to read the paper in my typical Sunday leisurely fashion. All went as planned this morning until it got to the newspaper part. Erik had already left for a bike ride, so I figured the paper would be waiting on the kitchen table. Nope. Not there. Okay the paper has been coming later on Sunday morning, but geez it's after 9am. I go out front and look around. Nope. No paper. Once I realized that my paper really hadn't been delivered, I felt really off-balance. Now what do I do? It seemed like my whole day was going to be off if I didn't adhere to this routine that I've been following faithfully for years.

So I made a cup of coffee and I checked out the front window several times over a 15 or 20 minute period. Nope still no paper. I noticed on one of my window searches that my neighbor across the street must be having an experience similar to mine. I watched him walk to the end of his drive-way and look this way and that to no avail. Then he turned back toward the up incline of his drive-way to see if his paper was perhaps thrown under one of his cars. Nope not there either. He looked rather dismayed too. Somehow I took some comfort in the fact that it appeared that my neighbor's world was also knocked a little off kilter. Plus if he didn't get his paper either, then chances were the newspaper guy probably just tied one too many on last night and was getting a late start on his route. So I playfully admonished myself and told myself that I could do something else until the paper came. But this morning I didn't take much comfort in that notion because Sarah and I are working on Sundays for awhile. So all I could think was that if the paper did come shortly, I wouldn't have the opportunity to read it in my usual lazy and thorough fashion.

I took my coffee and sat down to watch whatever show was on HGTV. It was a British import called the City Gardener. After a few minutes I got caught up in it and forgot to go to the window for my newspaper vigil.

What do you think happened next? Well as soon as I stopped thinking about the damn newspaper it was delivered. I looked out the window after the show was over and there it was. All nice and big and fat sitting out there at the end of the drive-way just waiting for me. I did get to read a bit of it before Sarah came over, but my Sunday morning routine was shot to hell.

Now I'd like to think that I'm a pretty flexible and adaptable person, but I thought it was quite funny and odd that I was so thrown off by having my Sunday paper reading routine altered. I apparently had become waaay too attached it. For a minute there, I thought I would be grouchy and off all day if I didn't have my way.

Routines can be good and necessary in the proper context. Every morning I brush my teeth and I put sunscreen on my face as well rain or shine. These are good and necessary routines. I don't want or need my teeth to rot, and I've already had one bout of skin cancer so I don't want another. So this is the good kind of routine.

However, my Sunday routine is not necessary, but I've apparently become quite attached to it...and I found that I may not be as flexible as I think I am sometimes.

I finished reading the paper this afternoon. My Sunday morning routine was thrown off from the start, but it didn't ruin my day and I wasn't a big grouch either. And I know I probably have other unnecessary routines too. But I need to be sure not to become inflexible about them...and go with the flow.

I sure don't want to wind up some crotchety old lady who acts like a spoiled brat if she doesn't get everything just so and all her way. We all know how pleasant those kinds of people are! And maybe their first step on the way to inflexible crotchetyness was they had a Sunday paper reading routine that they could not deviate from whatsoever! Okaaay, that's motivation enough for me! Alright so maybe that's a bit dramatic...but being properly motivated works wonders for me! And I really don't want to be the old lady on the street that all the kids are afraid of just because I became inflexible with my personal routines. Who would have thought that such an innocuous routine as reading the Sunday paper could be such a slippery slope?! Maybe I'll go for a walk next Sunday morning instead!

And moving along...

Alrighty...I think I used up plenty of words and energy the last couple of days talking about something that bugs me. I noticed it doesn't really help at all to talk about it either...especially since there isn't a real solution. So that being said, I think I need to move along and focus my energies and thoughts in a more positive direction.

One of the ways that I refocus my thoughts and energies is to read something from one of my favorite philospher/writers, Ralph Waldo Emerson. Emerson was part of the American Transcendentalist movement of mid-19th century New England which included other great thinkers and writers such as Louisa May Alcott, Emily Dickinson, Henry David Thoreau and more. The American Women's Suffrage movement may owe its beginnings to this group of progressive thinking individuals.

The American Transcendentalist ideas can't be boiled down to a few sentences of dogma. For one, they had no rigid dogma. But the common thread of this movement is the idea that all in life is closely interconnected including nature, humanity, and the divine. Once I began reading many of their ideas, I realized that their thoughts appear deceptively simple. But there's an elegance and underlying rich complexity to these ideas that in my mind put these folks far ahead of their time.

One of the common themes to Emerson's writings is that he urged humanity to look beyond the surface of life, to not be satisifed with the status quo, and to see life as a lifelong journey for personal growth. These things are just the tip of the Emerson iceberg though...because he espoused so much more.

When I feel myself getting off-center, reading Emerson quite often helps me restore balance. And in our busy, bustling, materialistic world, I think it's often easy to lose our way. I'm gonna end this with one of my favorite Emerson passages that almost without fail helps me correct my course.

Success

To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.

–Ralph Waldo Emerson

Superficiality....Round 2

Okaaaay...I feel like I'm not done with this topic and I feel the need to expand and clarify my views on superficiality. What ultimately prompted my tirade on superficiality is an article that I read in the paper yesterday morning. The article discussed this new up and coming social class known as the "Gold Collar" class, which is comprised of primarily twenty-somethings who live at home still with their parents and usually work service jobs. One of the experts who has started to study this increasing group says that these young adults decided to forego college not because they think it's too hard, but because they don't want to expend the effort. The gold collar class has champagne tastes on a beer budget according to the expert, and focus almost all of their energies on obtaining designer luxuries and spending time in high end clubs flaunting what they have. One young woman stated that it makes her happy to buy expensive luxury items. The article basically concluded that this class of self-involved people with little or no practical skills pose a potential concern to the future of our society. If we have all these unskilled, unmotivated big spenders who will be leading government and businesses when their time comes to step up to the plate? The twenty-somethings interviewed for the article all plainly stated that they love luxury stuff and they like the way obtaining these things makes them feel...namely like big shots for awhile. They readily admitted in the article to focusing their lives on the pursuit of luxury to the exclusion of all else. Okay, if all you can talk about are your designer clothes, your pricey car, and your expensive electronics, then yes in my book that makes you superficial. And this seems to be a growing trend. That scares me.

What do I think is a well rounded individual? I think having a variety of interests is key to being well rounded. Do you have to be college educated to be well rounded? Nope. I don't think so. I think that having more than one interest is the key. Well rounded individuals aren't all the same. That's the beauty of life...differences. Can you be a genius and not well rounded? Yep. For example, a piano prodigy can live, eat and breathe the piano to the exclusion of all else and while it's wonderful to have such fabulous talent if the piano prodigy doesn't develop other interests then I believe they're shortchanging themselves in life. And they, therefore, are not a well rounded individual. Once again, a variety of interests is a good thing for all of us.

I really try not to be judgemental about anyone or anything. However the key word there is try. And I do mean that I try, but I know that I'm not always successful. I believe that it isn't possible for anyone to be competely non-judgemental. It's too ingrained in us as humans and served a purpose in our evolutionary survival. So all we can do is try our best to be non-judgemental. But you know what, depending on the circumstances being judgemental is not necessarily a bad thing. For example, imagine a woman walking alone on a fairly deserted city street in the early evening and ahead she's sees a group walking toward her but she can't make out what they look like. But it looks like a group and since she's alone she's potentially concerned for her safety. As she gets closer she's sees that it's a group of about 5 or 6 men...some white some black...and she's sees that they're all dressed in business suits and are clean cut. She relaxes for the most part, but not completely and continues on past the men. How about a slightly different scenario? Let's say she sees a group of white men approaching, but she's sees that they appear to be young adults and dressed in punky or gang type clothes. At that point she feels afraid and decides to walk into the first available store to avoid the young guys. Or what if it were a bunch of teenage girls, but dressed in jeans and t-shirts? She may not have even flinched. So what happened here? That woman made a judgement of the group ahead of her and made a decision about her potential safety based on that quick judgement. Could she have been wrong? You bet. She judged the young punk looking guys and deemed them to be potentially threatening. And she decided that the teenage girls were not a threat. In truth, she could have misjudged both or all three, but she had to make a quick judgement based on circumstances. And we all do make these kinds of judgements to varying degrees. We've all been wrong at one time or another about our first impressions of people. That's human nature. All we can do is to try our best to judge fairly. And when we're wrong we should correct our mistake or at the very least not repeat it. Unfortunately, some people don't succeed with this and consequently their being judgemental becomes the cornerstone of their existence until they ultimately become hateful people. That's just wrong, and sad too.

So if I meet someone at a party who talks about the fancy neighborhood that they live in, the exclusive school that their kids go to, their troubles with their luxury car, and so on to the exclusion of all else. And if I notice that while I'm speaking they're not listening, but rather they look like they're only waiting for their turn to talk....I will probably make a preliminary judgement that this person is superficial. Does that mean that I won't become friends with them. Does that mean that I won't give them a chance? Nope that's not what that means. Is it possible that there's more to them than meets the eye? Yep. It's possible. Do I have any superficial friends? Yep. Brad is pretty superficial and he has interests other than status and materialism. But his superficiality comprises a good portion of his make-up, and I admit his superficiality bothers me. Is he a close friend? I'd have to say no. Why? Hmm, I'd have to say his superficiality is a big part of it because I think it limits the depth of friendship.

But what's important to me may not be important to you. And that's okay. That's what makes life spicey and interesting. Some people are not bothered by superficiality in the least, but they may find judgemental people to be much more bothersome. That's life.

So I have to admit that superficiality bothers me. I don't understand how superficial people can be happy only skating along the surface of life seemingly oblivious to others, to thinking, to wondering, to imagining and to living fully and completely. It makes me sad to see people not desiring to look beneath the surface of life. But when you take on all of life, you take on both the good and the bad..and the neat and the messy. I believe that on the surface, superficial people are trying to avoid unhappiness and bad things by surrounding themselves with the material trappings of happiness. But it's all a facade. Like Oz. What appears on the surface to be fabulous is nothing more than a fantasy perpetrated by a small man hiding behind a curtain. Dorothy found out in time that her happiness was not to be found in some fake fantasy, but back home. Home is ourselves and within ourselves. We can only find true happiness within by fully embracing all of life and all the mess that comes with it. Sadly I fear that superficial people dwell in the land of Oz.

Superficiality...

Sarah and I were talking today, and she was telling me about her friend, Gennie. Sarah was telling me how much she likes her, but she doesn't really care for most of Gennie's friends. Sarah said that most of Gennie's friends are annoyingly superficial and shallow which is surprising because Gennie is neither of these things.

So that got me to thinking. In my own unscientific observations, I've noticed that there seems to be a preponderance of shallow and superficial people. If you watch the types of people that are on those reality shows you'd think that everyone in America is shallow and sometimes just plain dumb. So I asked Sarah if she thought that there are more shallow people now than in the past. And yes, she thinks there are. She thinks it's related to how materialistic our society has become over the years. It seems that too many people are mostly concerned with what and how much stuff they have and how they compare to their friends and neighbors. It's all about what you wear, what you drive, and what you own. Hmmm, I'd say I have to concur with that assessment.

It seems to me that too many people don't care anymore about how well read or how knowledgable you are. Do that many people really even form their own political opinions anymore or are their opinions based on what they heard a commentator say on tv? I've run into this quite often. People are full of sound bite-type opinions. I've asked these people to expand on their particular political opinion and explain why they think the way they do. Quite often they can't because they heard this particular opinion and liked it or their friends believe it, so they espoused it just like that. No investigation whatsoever. Some celebrity believes it, so that's good enough!

So are we doomed as a society because of our rampant materialism? Will shallowness and superificiality take over everyday society...that is if it hasn't already. On the other hand, I don't think that pretentious intellectualism is any better than shallowness. In some ways, it's just the flip side of the same coin. Only with pretentious intellectuals, they're trying to impress people not with their material status, but with intellectualism.

What happened to being a well rounded and interesting individual? To me this means that you can carry on a conversation that is not centered on material pursuits. You are informed and aware of the world around you. You have well thought-out opinions based on your own personal research and reasoning. You have a basic understanding of how our government works, and you know who our leaders are. You know basic geography, and not just how to get to the nearest mall. You're concerned about the well being of others including those less fortunate than you. And so on and so on.

Hey, I'm not against material things and luxuries. I like them too, but they don't define my outer or inner life. And they shouldn't for anyone. It's nice to have stuff, but other than our basic necessities it's about wanting and not needing. Should we be defined by our desires for things? Should we be defined by our status based on materialism? I know I don't want to be defined that way.

I guess maybe the bigger question is how can so many people be satisfied being shallow and superficial? What kind of life can that be? It sounds very tiring to keep up with the Jones' and very empty, too. And if materialism is the center of all your conversations, it seems to me that makes for a very boring person. I certainly don't want people to think of me in relation to the material goods that I've possessed throughout my lifetime, but rather that I am compassionate, smart, funny, humble(!), and so on.

Socrates said, "The unexamined life isn't worth living". And I couldn't agree more...

Disappointment...

Disappointment is an utterly crappy feeling. Blech. I told myself that I wouldn't be disappointed if I didn't get this, and yet somehow I am. I'll get over it...this I know with certainty. It's just been a very long time that I've felt so disappointed in not getting something. Since I told myself beforehand that it really would be okay if it didn't come through, I'm really surprised by my reaction. Was I lying to myself? No, I don't think that's it. I think I was just kidding myself. And the more I think about why I'm disappointed, it's because getting it would have kept my mind occupied with fun and challenging things for a good while.

So I'm not gonna deny that I'm disappointed. Sometimes the best way to get over something is through it. So I'll go ahead and feel disappointed....not to wallow in it, but just to acknowledge it. I know in my head that not getting something isn't the end of the world....and it isn't, but my heart needs just a couple days to catch up.

Another Day, another dollar...

Well let's hope it's more than a dollar! I really like working for myself, and one of the benefits is that my pay is in direct proportion to how much I work. On the other hand, one of the detriments to working for myself is that my pay is in direct proportion to how much I work! That's the thing with working for yourself. Some aspects can be both positive and negative.

We're working like crazy maniacs right now, and what helps to keep me motivated is knowing that we'll be seeing the money coming in September and October. And it's looking to be a tidy sum! Hell it should be with all the hard work that we're expending! I remember while working at the last big consulting company that it didn't matter how hard or how many overtime hours you put in, you were paid the same every week. So overtime wasn't pleasant, but unfortunately necessary from time to time. On the other hand, if business was slow at the big consulting company, I could still count on being paid no matter what. Theoretically it was supposed to even out in the end. I think that the corporation still came out waaay ahead.

So I guess what I'm getting at is that although I'm going to be pretty darn worn out by the end of the month, I'll be compensated for it generously. In the past when work just trickled in my paycheck was also a trickle or less.

I guess that my point is, if I had one that is, is that I like my salary being in direct proportion to my efforts. I don't think it's about control, but really more about freedom.

Another long day ahead tomorrow. But that's okay. I set my own hours, and work at home. I wear shorts or jeans every day for work except of course for client meetings. I can take time out for my afternoon hike/run and return later to complete a report or task. I can run errands at lunch without having to watch the clock. How do I accomplish all this? Well you see, my pay is in direct proportion to how much I work!

I fell in love today...or maybe it's lust!

I don't believe in love at first sight at all. Now lust at first sight, well that's another story! Anyway against my better judgement today, I went and fell in love. Yep, that's right you read that correctly! But it's not exactly what you're thinking.

I still don't believe that two people can fall in love at first sight. So what's up?! I fell in love with a house today... and it was all unintended and by accident. My sister told me the other day that she's sick of living in Victoria and she's ready to put her house up for sale and move to San Antonio. I think that's a fine idea. It'd be nice to have her here to help run interference with my mom! So yesterday I thought that I'd start doing a little house research and I stumbled across a house being built not far from Friedrich Park on Cap Mountain Drive. Wowee zowee!! They call the house a modern Victorian. The first floor outside has limestone facing and the color of the siding on the rest of the house is a deep mustardy color. It's got a huge old fashioned-type front porch with an awesome view looking down the mountain/hill. It has a half-acre lot with a few live oaks.

So this afternoon after finishing up with work on a report, I decided to drive out to the house. Just for research, you know. Erik decided to go along with me as long as I stopped at Half-Priced Books on the way so that he could get a book.

The road leading into the subdivision was very windy and hilly. All the lots are at least a half-acre and most of the houses you can't even see from the road because of how far back they're set and how wooded the area is. There are no street lights and it's far enough away from the city that you can see the stars at night from the front porch. Anyway as soon as I pulled up to the house and we got out Erik, the 18 year old, was exclaiming what an awesome house it is! Hmmm, I thought... so it isn't just me. Plus if an 18 year old young man who normally couldn't care less about houses is exclaiming how cool it is then well....that's got to mean something!!

We couldn't go inside since all the doors and windows were locked. And yes I would have climbed in a window if I found one unlocked. Erik would have been mortified, but I certainly would have and have done it in the past! From what I could see of the downstairs, it looks very nice inside too. It also looks like there's a loft/library at the top of the stairs with nearly floor to ceiling windows with a mountain view. The neighbors next door have a horse and her pen area is located 20 feet from the house's dining room. I thought that was cool to have a horse right next door. It was just so quiet and peaceful out there. And a half-acre lot...that's huge or at least it's huge to me!

Somewhere along the line I decided that I was looking for me and not my sister. I haven't been this excited about something in a long time! And I probably can't afford it right now, but I went ahead and made an appointment to take a look at the inside with the realtor. Nothing will probably come of it...but I just feel compelled to look at it anyway. So maybe after looking at it and having a cool down period, I'll be able to get it out of my system. But I have to say, that this is the first time that I've fallen so instantaneously for a house and one in my price range. Sure I've loved plenty of way too expensive houses at first glance, but this is the first potentially obtainable one that I've gone gah-gah for! Okay, so I think I'm a bit too attached already. I just hope that cooler heads prevail tomorrow!

Yikes, this lust at first sight stuff is hard on the psyche not to mention the body!

This is the object of my affection... 

A Jung Personality Test...

I'm intrigued by Carl Jung's ideas, so I had to take this one...

Jung Test

Extroverted (E) 58.06% Introverted (I) 41.94%
Intuitive (N) 51.85% Sensing (S) 48.15%
Feeling (F) 57.14% Thinking (T) 42.86%
Judging (J) 66.67% Perceiving (P) 33.33%

ENFJ - "Persuader". Outstanding leader of groups. Can be aggressive at helping others to be the best that they can be. 2.5% of total population.

Take Free Jung Personality Test
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Enneagram Test Results Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||||||||| 73% Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||| 53% Type 3 Image Awareness |||||||||| 33% Type 4 Sensitivity |||||| 26% Type 5 Detachment |||||||||||| 43% Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||| 40% Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||| 53% Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||| 50% Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||| 70% Your main type is 1 Your variant is social

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personality tests by similarminds.com

Life and how we choose to see it...

Today I had to go with my mom to her bank so that she could add me to her checking account and safety deposit box account for survivorship rights in case something should happen to my parents. My mom is a planner extraordinaire which is fine, and is not the point of this story. However, by running this errand with my mom today, she unwittingly reminded me that much of life is how we choose to see it.

My mom arrived at my house on schedule to pick me up and it took about 15 minutes to get to the bank. She has a favorite banker that she likes to deal with, but when we got to the bank mom found out that her favorite is on vacation this week. Mom was visibly disappointed. There was another customer who got there just a few seconds ahead of us, so the woman at the front desk signed us all in and asked us to wait in the waiting area. After about two minutes the first customer was called in to meet with a banker. Mom still seemed disappointed that her banker lady was on vacation and so I asked if she thought that no one else there would be as helpful. This question earned me the 'evil eye' and no verbal response, so I immediately dropped it. A short time later, it was our turn. The banker, Stacy, was very polite, personable, and efficient. In hindsight, I think it's funny how Stacy almost instinctively knew to refer to my mom by her last name only. Stacy called me Renee, and I was fine with that. Anyhoo, it took about 10 minutes for Stacy to do the paperwork for the checking account and since my dad wasn't there to sign the signature card, Stacy sent it home with mom for dad to sign and provided mom with a pre-addressed postage paid envelope. Then to access the safety deposit boxes, you have to have your palm scanned. I thought it was kinda cool in a way. It only took a couple of minutes for Stacy to do it. Mom had a few things to put in her safety deposit box which we did, and stopped by Stacy's office on the way out. She was very gracious with mom and me, and thanked us both and shook my hand. Once again, she somehow knew not to shake mom's hand.

As soon as we got out to the car, mom breathed a big sigh of relief and said that the whole thing was a huge hassle. What?! She thought we had to wait too long. She was upset her banker lady wasn't there. She thought the paperwork to add me to the account was a major production. She complained about the amount of traffic on the road on the way home. She complained about shopping at one of the nearby malls, and indicated that it was terrible to get in line behind a Latina because invariably it was going to be a big production to check-out. (Note: I apologize to any Latina women who happen to read this. I didn't say it and believe me I don't share my mom's views, I'm only stating what she said) Then she complained about the terrible drivers on the road. And so on and so on.

It all started to click in my head once we left the bank and my mom said that it was a terrible hassle. All I could think was, huh? Hmmm, let's see here's how my trip went. The drive to the bank was uneventful. The traffic wasn't bad, and we were lucky with a few of the pesky lights on the way. Once we arrived at the bank, the greeter was friendly and polite, and indicated that we would only have to wait a few minutes. She was right. Mom and I couldn't have waited for more than five minutes and in my book, I thought that was pretty damn good. Once Stacy seated us, it only took her 10 minutes or so to do the paperwork and another five to do my palm scan. She was both personable and efficient. A good combination! From pick-up to drop-off, I was gone a little over an hour, and honestly I thought the whole thing was going to take longer since we went on a Friday morning which seems to me to be a busy bank day.

On and off all day, I've been thinking about how pervasive my mom's negativity is and I don't think that she even realizes it. Once we got in the car and she said that it was such a hassle, I told her that I didn't think it was bad at all. She either couldn't or wouldn't agree. Oh well. I think if the process was even faster than it was or if her banker lady was there, she would have found something to complain about.

My mom and I had the same experience today or did we? All the events happened the same way to both of us, but we had two different viewpoints for most of it. Today for me is a reminder that so much of life really is about how we choose to see and react to events. The bank visit was the same for both my mom and me, but we didn't experience it the same way at all. I think many of life's events are that way for all of us. It depends on us. On how we are. On how we see. On how we react. On how we feel. And our expectations play a part too. So much of life is subjective, and my mom really reminded me of that today.

I admit that her negativity was getting to me today, and in the past I probably would have disagreed with her at every turn thinking that I could change her mind. I've learned somewhere along the line that that's just the way she is. Negative. So I let it go. She just views life in a negative fashion, and probably always will. It's sad, but true.

How in the hell did she wind up with such a positive thinking daughter? Beats me. Maybe it's my version of rebellion or really it's just that I can't live her way and see life her way. It's so wearying.

So I may not have control over many things, but I do control my own attitude toward life. And I think that makes all the difference in the world.

Lessons in multi-tasking...

Sarah and I had a very busy workday scheduled today. We had two rather substantial reports to complete and send out. Thursday is supposed to be one of Sarah's kid free days for work. But guess what? The babysitting plans partially fell through. Big brother's babysitting plans were still on, but the twinklets had no where to go!!

Sarah and I were bound and determined that we could handle the girls and get our reports completed. Upon arrival, Malone stayed in her car seat since she seemed pretty mellow and happy. So Sarah placed Malone next to her. On the other hand, Ripley or as she is affectionately called The Ripper arrived at the house demonstrating how she came by her nickname honestly! Since Sarah still had things to add to her report, I took Ripley. To keep Ripley chilled out you have to rotate her positions and activities. So since I had the invoices to complete as well as a few other miscellaneous things, I started out by crossing my left ankle over my right knee and placed Ripley in the triangle that I created. This way I can feed her a bottle one handed and type one handed if I have to. Plus since both she and her sister are much more alert more often, she can see my face sitting this way for some interaction.

While feeding Ripley, Malone decided that she was hungry too, but Sarah was able to prop the bottle up in the car seat so that she could continue typing and every once in awhile the bottle would fall out of Malone's mouth and need to be repositioned. We got to the point where we had a pretty good system going to where for the most part we could rotate the girls between us and continue working. Both girls stayed awake most of the morning until Ripley finally conked out near lunchtime.

At lunchtime we grabbed the appendices for our reports and packed the girls in the car. We dropped the appendices off at the copy place to be copied while we went somewhere for lunch. Ripley slept all through lunch. Yahoo. And Malone kinda dozed and periodically threatened to fuss. Lunch was fairly quick and thankfully uneventful. We picked up our copies and headed back.

Unfortunately, once we got back both girls were ready for a bottle. Once again, Malone had the propped bottle. The propped bottle doesn't work with Ripley since she's too much of a wiggler...so Auntie Renee had bottle duty while Sarah typed cover letters...and I proofread Sarah's report while feeding Ripley. Only one hand needed for editing!

Report binding time finally! Ripley finished her bottle, but was both gassy and fussy. So she stayed with me for the binding process. Whenever either she or her sister are gassy, I lay them across my legs on their tummies. And I either pat their backs or since I'm a fidgeter by nature...I fidget one or both of my legs so that they get a little bouncy-bouncy action. Malone happens to love this position and quite often will fall asleep like this. Okay each report to be punched and bound was about 2.5 inches thick....so lots of punching on the machine. Since Ripley was on my lap, I couldn't pull my chair in all the way so I had to reach some to punch the paper! Ripley kinda just grunted and threatened to fuss while punching and binding the first report. In the meantime, Malone decided that she'd had enough of the car seat so Sarah carried her around and went back and forth between the computer and printer.

After finishing binding the first report, we traded babies since each was bored and beginning to fuss in whatever position we each had them. So I took Malone to lay across my legs and to let her do her swimming motions. Once I placed her across my legs and started fidgeting she was happy as a clam, and Ripley was happy to be back with mommy and no longer on her tummy.

They both cooperated pretty well while I bound the last report and Sarah put the cover letters on letterhead. Yippee I finished my task and started on the mailing envelopes when both Malone and Ripley decided that it was meltdown time...which means for Sarah and me time to switch babies! Ten more minutes and we got everything done. Yahoo we did it and I for one really can't believe it! We really had a lot to get done and just finaling a report takes time even without babies to juggle and entertain.

Neither one of us got frustrated and really we both knew that if the girls didn't cooperate as well as they did that the reports would have to wait or I could have finished them after Sarah left. But we managed to get the mix just right and kept the girls entertained and fed. It's actually kinda funny how we managed to get an unplanned rhythm going with both the work and the girls. I know that my adrenaline was zooming all day. I felt like that I had such an excess of adrenaline with the day's challenge that I went for my hike/run as usual just to burn it off. And believe me it's burned off and I will sleep very well tonight!

So today was challenging indeed and in a weird way kinda fun too. It certainly broke up the monotony of a routine work day, and we did get everything done that we needed to! So I think we gave new meaning to multi-tasking today, and we proved if there's a will there's a way!

Too tired for words...

I just got home from my babysitting day at Sarah's. I was there from 10:30 am to 5:30 pm, and I am exhausted. I'm even more tired than if I would have worked in the yard all day. I'm more tired than if I would have painted every room in the house! I'm more tired than if I would have hiked 50 miles!

How in the world did I ever forget how tiring taking care of babies and a toddler is? I think it must be our brain's protective mechanism. And let me tell you, my brain did a fabulous job with the baby care amnesia!

I've decided that being a full-time mom or dad or daycare worker are probably the hardest jobs in the world. At a minimum they've got to be the most tiring.

I'm glad to be home in my quiet and peaceful house. Ahhh. Time for rest....too tired for words.

Inexplicable Cruelty

There was an article in Saturday's paper along with a follow-up article today about how some workers with the nearby town of Jourdanton decided to handle the overcrowding at the town's pound. It seems that some workers were transporting some of the pound's overflow to the city's sanitary sewer treatment plant where a sanitary sewer worked placed the dogs' cages into the water to drown the dogs. What?! Chills washed over my body and tears welled up in my eyes when I read this Saturday.

How does one think that this is a viable form of euthanasia to place a dog in a cage and lower him into the water to suffer and thrash about until he drowns? It seems that a teenage boy who was working at the treatment plant over the summer was so upset and distraught over the sight that he told his mother about it. His mother then immediately called the Mayor and City Manager who apparently took immediate actions to halt the practice and suspended the employee who was drowning the dogs pending an investigation.

At least one question immediately comes to mind. Wasn't anyone else who worked at the Treatment Plant sickened and appalled by this practice? And why was only one teeenage boy upset and outraged at the Plant?

The City Manager in today's follow-up story explained that the city employee who drowned the dogs has been reprimanded. The City Manager explained that he didn't see any reason for further action because he discussed the situation with the employee who apparently expressed remorse. He further explained that the employee in question had no idea that his actions were wrong, and so the City Manager couldn't see firing the guy and destroying his career over one mistake.

What the hell is that crap? How can someone take living beings and place them in cages, cruelly drown them, and not know or think that there's anything wrong with this practice? How can a City Manager see this act as simply a mistake? How can any feeling, sane, compassionate human being think that these acts were simply mistakes and not cruelty?

Luckily at least the Mayor and one City Council Member are not happy with the outcome at all and have called for an outside independent investigation. They even stated that criminal charges would be considered too. Thank goodness for that. Let's hope that there's plenty of public outcry over this much like there was when the San Antonio paper ran an undercover exposé of the San Antonio pound and now big changes are being made with the pound's operating procedures.

Unfortunately, whatever the outcome is, it won't fix the underlying problem which seems to be much too prevalent here in South Texas. And the problem is that far too many people think that animals don't count at all. Animals are nothing more than disposable objects to far too many people, so they reason that their acts aren't cruelty if an animal isn't given the same considerations as human beings. The whole idea sickens me.

Lastly, I'm terribly concerned about the teenage boy who witnessed these events and who undoubtedly was terribly affected. I hope that his parents get him some help, if necessary. Unfortunately, I'm afraid the events that he witnessed will have a scarring effect on his psyche for the rest of his life. I truly hope that this boy will recover and retain his good heart.

I am the type of person who really tries to see the best in people, but when I read about events such as these it rocks my moorings and faith quite a bit. It makes me wonder if my faith in people isn't misplaced. It makes me feel dumb and naive, and it makes me wonder if goodness really isn't as prevalent as I would like to believe.

Time will tell...

Monday Musings...

Oy, what a busy Monday and it looks like it's going to be busy the rest of the week and for the rest of the month. And we're going to be busy without even having heard anything on that gigundus proposal from a few weeks back.

Having lots of business coming in means good cash flow for awhile. Cash flow has got to be the biggest and most constant worry for small business owners. So I'm glad for the work, but it's going to be very hectic for the next several weeks and I'll probably have to work some weekends too. The lazy part of me is not looking forward to that at all, but my rational side realizes that consulting work comes in cycles. So right about when I think I couldn't possibly write another report, the current cycle of work will drop off to allow us all to catch our breath.

Right now we're in the midst of a cash flow slump so that will help with the motivation for this month's work. It was a bit slow the month of June when Sarah had the twinkets. On one hand, I was glad that there wasn't too much going on that month because Sarah would have wanted to work from her hospital bed. But now we're feeling the effects moneywise for our slower than normal June.

I've decided that learning to live with the ebb and flow of cashflow is good practice for the uncertainties of life. And it's good practice for me to keep my worrying in check. Compared to this time last year, I feel like I have my worrying under control. I feel more like I control my worry and it no longer controls me. Although I do backslide a bit now and then. This year I feel much better not worrying and somewhere along the line and this is perhaps going to seem obvious, but my worrying did nothing to change the outcome either way. Once I was able to embrace that idea, I was finally able to get a handle on the worrying. And seeing that things work out one way or another has helped too. So this month with the limited cash flow, I've been having to give myself a few pep talks so that I don't backslide into worryland! Having lots of work and certain future cashflow helps with the pep talks too.

The biggest thing is that regardless of cashflow being a constant concern, I am so much happier working for myself and not for some corporation where I wouldn't have the freedom and independence that I have now. So for me the freedom and independence that I now enjoy more than make up for worrying about cash flow.